Job Loss; The Best Bitch

whitneysavageau
Sep 2, 2019
4 min read

well, it has officially been two years since i was let go from my job.

OPE! betcha didn't know that i was let go since i'm still with the same company.

if you've lost your job before, it major sucks. like completely trash, sucks. ESPECIALLY, if you did nothing wrong and everything to prevent it. it was even worse just being an intern and getting terminated before i even got to finish my internship.

i went into work that day, so happy. which was typical. i did really enjoy going to work. the people i worked with were amazing, i was learning an insane amount, and i just felt that it all clicked. early that morning on my way into the office i send a snapchat soo excited to go into work, the weather was beyond beautiful, i was feeling great about myself. .. and then not even a few hours into my work day, it all hit.

i was asked to go have a chat. (now i really didnt think anything of it. i was after all having a great day.) but this felt so unreal, i swear its like a movie was happening in front of me..

i walked into a conference room, sitting there was someone ive never talked too and a folder at the head of the table where i was directed to sit. it was a bright blue folder; stuck in the top right corner was a crisp white sticker with my name in bold black letters.

i sat down.

now honestly i dont even remember our full conversation. it kind of seemed all like a black out until the end. i tried my hardest not to cry as we opened the folder and went through each sheet one at a time.

at the end i was told to get all of my things- not even finish the work day, i was done.

i went into another room with another person i had never met. they said they were there to talk, if i needed it. well if you know me at all, you know in life events like this talking is the absolute last thing i want to do. i grabbed the very minimal things i had in the office with my eyes full of tears, face completely washed out, arms broken out in hives, and i walked out to my car.

my boss looked at me and said that if i needed any help or recommendations he would be happy to help, since he didnt want to see me leave.

the first worst thing about losing my job, was well- that i lost it. and it felt like everything i had worked for was taken from me and it kind of was. but the next worst thing, was that i was not home. i wasnt with my family. granted, i had family- but its not the same. i hate feeling like a mooch or someone who just bums around, but i felt like since i lost my job thats what i was going to be to my boyfriends parents at the time.

so instead of just dwelling on it for days- it more so motivated me to get other things in line. i went home right away and updated my resume and spent the next week applying for jobs.. as many as i could find.

now, dont get me wrong. i cried. i cried a lot and felt so broken and confused. it was my first job out of college, i move out of my state; away from my entire family for this. for it then to be taken right from under me. and trust me, i get it. companies dont do well, sometimes things fall apart and people need to be let go, i get it.

i got an unpaid internship, in design, and was going to work another job at target or something until i found another fully paid design job.

but then my boss reached out to me- about a week later. he asked if he were to make a case for me to come back, if i would.

i barely thought about it, it took me less than a day to decide. i absolutely wanted this job back.

but i did keep my other internship as well.

as much as it sucks, having that happen to me. i’m so glad that it happened earlier rather than later. to understand the feelings and what really happens when you have to file for unemployment. it doesnt get easy, but i am grateful for the experience even if it was a shitty one. i’m thankful that i had people out here to help me through it. i am mostly thankful that my parents have always shown me how to stand my ground while falling apart- because that, is a true art.

it was the first, but i know it won’t be the last time that has happened. now it is one of my drivers that push me every day.

and i hope that time doesnt come for any of you, but if it does.

know that it takes a lot out of you- but it’s not something you can’t learn from. you’re a lot stronger than you think in situations like that.

thanks for stopping by,

thee savage 🤘🏻🖤