How to make a relationship easier

Step one .. COMMUNICATE

this does not just go for intimate relationships. but all relationships.. friendships, family relationships.. every relationship anyone has

seriously the one thing that always goes wrong. no one knows how to just say what they want. everyone is afraid of offending everyone else. ... but then once someone says what they want, or don't want shit goes off the rails.

everyone just needs to be more forward. i get called out all the time for it often. .. do i always say things in the best way, no.. a lot of times i come off more aggressive than i should and i know that. but i would much rather be more aggressive than just passively say that things are okay when they're clearly not.

i can guarantee that you'll be a lot happier if you can explain what you want and need in a relationship and with yourself.

now lets get this out though .. just because people should be more forward, does not mean you need to be rude. you can get your point across without being an ass. .. weird, coming from me, i know, i'm working on it.

when i was dating in college,. actually dating. as in going out with multiple men on multiple different dates. sometimes more than twice a week. - does that mean i slept with them all? no. does that mean i'm a hoe, or any of the other names people like to use because you go out with more than one person? no. it's normal for people to want to go out with more than one person until something is defined.

but when i was dating, i did always make it clear to them that i was not exclusive with them and that i was talking to multiple people. .. the ones that didn't like that, well we stopped talking. the ones that were fine with it, we kept going on dates and going to parties, it was a good time. ,.. sometimes. but that's just the way dating goes. not everyone is compatible, obviously we all know that.

whats not a good time is when someone thinks they can just overpower what the other wants. if someone wants to date and date more than one person, SAY THAT. if someone wants to just date one person, SAY THAT. if you like someone more than a friend and you want to see where it goes, SAY IT. don't just say it to your friends, or your family. say it to that person. if you don't want to talk to someone anymore SAY IT - do you have to give them a reason? no. not if you don’t want too. - and if you're on the other end, does it suck not knowing the reason? yeah. but does that person have the right to just want to stop talking to you? yes.

this is life. not everyone owes everyone an explanation for what they're doing.

so many people need to grow thicker and tougher skin. things aren't always easy. especially when it comes to emotions.. that's when shit really gets messed up. but what’s really messed up is the lack of communication in everyone. i will never understand why people are so completely and utterly scared to explain how they feel.. or say what they want. when in reality some of the reason that you might not have everything you want or that you're unhappy is because you don't know how to explain what you want. - which is a different issue that needs to be sorted out. but communicating what you want with people you're in relationships with shouldn't be that hard, or at least not as hard as you're making it seem.

does rejection suck? of course it does. - but it also makes you stronger and better and gives you a new path to take.

does being broken up with suck? of course, its shit, - but does it open up more doors for you to better yourself, refine yourself, and give you a new direction.

does telling someone you cant be with them anymore suck? fuck yeah. do you know how hurtful that feels, when someone says they don't love you anymore... or asks why they even loved you in the first place? its. fucking. shit. but it makes you so much stronger. and a more well rounded person overall.

to sum it all up .... if you think being rejected is scary, or someone thinking less of you for saying what you want or how you feel is scary; think of how scary it is that you're holding back from everything you want and that you could actually have what you want and have people understand you in a better way but you're holding back, is only hurting yourself. how scary is that. i'd say a lot more scary than having someone be angry at you for just wanting to be happy when your happiness is way more than that.

thanks for reading. leave a comment or tell me something you want to hear about or something you need help with, maybe i'll write about it on the next one.

Happy Sunday everyone

-the savage